Mentor relationship – why your mentor isn’t your BFF
Why your mentor relationship isn't what you expected
[Tweet "There are huge misconceptions around the mentor relationship."] Mainly coming from the mentee. Many women anticipate a warm and empathetic mentor relationship which endures across decades. There is no doubt that some do. The media is full of historic mentoring relationships which have morphed into deep and meaningful connections. But your mentor isn’t your BFF. Although it’s helpful to like your mentor, for an effective mentor mentee relationship, it’s not even necessary. It’s important that you respect her, she treats you with integrity and supports you to meet your goals. But the warm fuzzy relationship which we read about is not necessarily the basis of a successful mentoring relationship.Paragraph
A mentor relationship story
Every week my notes came back covered from top to bottom with red editing symbols. I began to feel humiliated and then angry. Finally, after much prevaricating, I plucked up courage to ask if I could talk to her about it. I went into the meeting in an almost accusatory way.
It was a 10 minute conversation, but essentially the feedback was that I made careless mistakes in spelling names, I used 10 words when 4 would do, my vocabulary was too complex and I didn’t specify the action points clearly. I was also relaxed about getting them out so contributed to slowing down the business. In other words my record of the meeting was poor.
How to ensure a good mentor relationship
• Tell me about your career experience
• How do you think you might be able to support me?
• What was the biggest challenge you have faced in your career?
• What was your biggest disappointment and how did you handle it?
• What (if anything) would you have done differently in your career?
• Who was your mentor?
• How did you handle…..
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