He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

by | Feb 13, 2015

He loves me, he loves me not. Valentine's Day is drawing nearHe Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

He loves me .... or not? What will it be, Romeo? Do you fore-go getting into a relationship around Valentine's Day to avoid the stress of what to get your current flavor-of-the-month? Are you head over heels in love with someone? Or are you single?

[Tweet "Love is in the air, if you want it to be. With an open heart, love will always find a way."]

Truth be told, I'm in love with love or just being in love. The he loves me, he loves me not scenario plays in my head frequently.

It's really not that easy, though. I've been divorced for seven years and I still haven't found a love that will last. I envy those that find it right away. In my opinion, they've been graced with a gift. To find that someone who will complement me, that will share laughter, parenting woes, and a love of life is a dream of mine. Will it ever come true?

Cupid, draw back your bow and let your arrow go, straight through my lover's heart for me.

Will you write about love, romance or the true meaning of Valentine's Day, they asked me. As I thought about love, the assignment became more daunting and a sadness enveloped me.

What do I know about love? I haven't uttered the words I love you to a significant other since some time in 2008. That was around the last time those words left my lips. I know what I want in a relationship and I often dream of what will be, but I'm no expert. How can I be? It's been years since I've said those words.

[Tweet "But here's the million dollar question: Do we need to be in love to find true happiness?"]

I don't. I've been riding the happy train for a long time now. Being in love comes with ups and downs, all of which I'd gladly embrace if it/he walked into my life. And I'm often in a place high up in the clouds, loving life and embracing the moments. I've been told I exude happiness. Does this mean I'm capable of being in love? Of course it does. God has a plan for me, this I know, I'm just not so sure why I've been put on Love's waiting list. Take a seat please, ma'am, we'll call you when we're ready.

For goodness sake, BE READY ALREADY!!

What is love anyway? Is it a romantic connection between two individuals who vow to love each other for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, til death do they part? Can love be forced? Or does the heart know what it wants?

For me love is:

Watching my children grow into beautiful human beings.

My parents who've been married for over 50 years, who still hold hands and do things for each other without pause.

Random acts of kindness.

Coming home from work to the driveway, decks and walkway shoveled by my children.

When I've met that special someone, and our eyes connect making butterflies begin to flutter somewhere where my gut and heart meet.

Love is something we should experience every day. In that regard, it's easy. Love is all around us.

How do you define love? When's the last time you said I love you to a significant other?

 

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Anita, is a Registered Nurse, divorced Mom of three, runner, triathlete, and online fitness consultant. In her post marriage recovery journal, she chronicles daunting balancing acts, her leap into the dating world, pole dancing lessons in which she learns to ‘let go’, and the discovery of her Self. Excerpts from her forthcoming book appear in this column.

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